An Ode to the orifice's of gerbils and other small mammals!

In the words of Hammy "We've got to beat these boys, they rape gerbils!" Unfortunately at the weekend we failed to overcome these defilers of small mammals! However I'm sure such poor results can be overcome with such simple solutions as PASSING! But that's enough about that!

This Wednesday the 1's have Stirling at 5.30pm and the 2's take on the mighty Edinburgh 2's at 3pm, all of these festivities are taking place at Peffermill. The form book says that this should be an easy win for the 1's with them having won last seasons fixture 10-2. Unfortunately the form book isn't quite as nice to the 2's, but if trends are to be believed we should win this one 4-0 (i wish!) In all fairness though, if we're going to beat them it's going to be this season! We also get two bites of the cherry as we get to play them again this season, BRING IT ON!!!!

Also in the news this week, Ceilidh tickets have gone on sale. At £12.50 a head they're well worth it and the more of these that we sell the more ball tickets we get! So grab 'em while you can from any licensed branch of Sean!

This weekend the 1's are away in Greenock with all the bits and pieces still TBC. The 2's are at Saughton against Waverley Inveresk 4's . If this isn't a six point weekend it'll be a dissapointment, so my advice is: Pass the ball and we'll rattle in a hat full!

If there's anythin I've forgotten stick it in the comments section please!

Lots of Love Nick x

Fixchas!

Okay, to your left the beautiful list of fixtures should be displayed. If there's any incorrect fixures (ie i'm fairly sure the 2s have some kind of Carnegie fun going on at a different date to that supplied by Scottish Hockey) then scold me via the medium of email (sm42@hw.ac.uk) and I shall mock you in reply using a combination of girls names and statements questioning your sexual preference. Yes, the more astute of you will observe that it is 3.30(ish)am on the eve of a matchday. This may be attributed to myself and the esteemed (and very ginger) marcus tanning bottles of Thresher's finest in preparation for tomorrow's Stirling Uni II game. This is the kind of dedication I would like to see among freshers, and generally anyone concerned with hockey. Although i'm fairly sure Mr Morrow will do enough drinking for all of us, it's always a good idea to err on the side of excess, just to be on the safe side.

And that's "how" for now. Oh, no he didn't!

- Sean

edit: I'll try to get push-back times and venues for all of these fixtures so you won't have to wake up wee mark on the day of each match. Actually if you could wake wee mark anyway on those days with questions anyway it'd be peachy. In fact, i'm thinking of making a habit of phoning him up at 7am-ish most days and asking if he would like, say, a peanut or a pair of corduroy multi-purpose earmuffs or whatever.

Also, it's not necessarily mandatory to wear a headband whilst representing the majestic Heriot-Watt University, it certainly is encouraged. So should you spy a pink headband, baby blue headband, bandana with cannabis leaf on it, or any other slightly unorthodox pattern emblazened upon it, then be sure to snap it up. Bandanas come in useful when we're doing a hungover mental haka in front of Carnegie MCMXVIII and they feel super-duper intimidated, yo!

Changes afoot plus news of parties and games

Hear ye, Hear ye! I greet you all with news fresh from a meeting at the Sports Union! There is going to be a change to the way that training is run, meaning, we get a full pitch!!!! Monday night training shall be between the hours of 8 and 10 at peffermill and will now involve one hours fitness and one hours full pitch time. A rota will be put up explaining whether we've got skills or fitness first. We also have half a pitch booked for Thursday nights between 8.30 and 10. We may split this session between the 1's and 2's, doing half fitness and half skills, that is yet to be decided and will depend on what the captains feel will work best! Thursday night sessions will start in week 3.

After speaking to the clubs social convenors, a provisional date for pub golf has been set for week 3. This is however subject to change as we haven't told the girls yet! We also have Warm-up Wednesday coming. It's £4 in to the union and then a free bus to mood, there will be a lot of pint downing and games at the union, it's good fun! Be there or be a fud (to use Sean's word of the week)!

There is also discussion taking place about a possible 2 match series between the football team and the hockey team, as in - we play them at football and they play us at hockey. Then we all go to the pub (Where a boat race may take place, we just can't say!!!!)! It's a good chance for a bit of inter team mingling and a bit of banter.

Now for the serious matter of this weekends games. The first team kick off their season with what has traditionally been a bit of a bruiser against Hillhead 2's. This will take place at Royal High at 1pm. This is then followed by the 2's who take on Stirling Uni 2's at 2.30pm. Then we shall all pile down to the Village Inn for a bit of banter and a bevy (A prize to the first fresher who spots a trend here!).

This shall all be preceeded by a Freshers session tomorrow at 2pm at Peffermill. The freshers won't be down till 2.30 so feel free to get there early and have a knock about. If you would like to volunteer to drive freshers down please be at campus at 2pm, the more cars the better.

Any queries, just comment as per usual!

Love Nick x

p.s. Catches win matches!!!!

BUSA = Crazy

Hmm, on the BUSA website it looks like somebody got their wires crossed. I put the fixtures here a wee while back, and it would appear that something strange is afoot at BUSA. See, Stirling have been magically promoted to 1A, and have disappeared from our fixture list...to be replaced by Edinburgh 2, who for some reason are still in 1A. Confused? You're not alone...

edit: I must have checked it halfway through a re-jigging, as Edinburgh 2 are back in our league. A straight swap, fair enough!

Back Page Update!

After a long and in-depth chat between the Watt's club captain and treasurer there has been a final decision over subscriptions. Donations will be as follows, for first term returning students will pay £40 and then the same again for second term. This will cover transport, training, match fees and your usual subscriptions. This is a far more efficient way of collecting cash and prevents any disputes over who owes what, it also encourages players to train and play to get the most for their money. Freshers will pay £20 first term and then any that continue will pay £40 in the second term.
The reasoning is as follows: A lot of potential hockey players are playing rugby or football etc. as they are charging lower joining fees than us and then shafting the freshers for more money later. We are now in effect doing the same but ours is a lot easier to explain. The aim is to use this to get a good intake of freshers this year to bolster our numbers for the squad, social events and tour. There is a distinct possibility that some freshers will pay their joining fee and then not come back, this leaves us quids-in though as by lowering the joining fee more people will join than would have with a higher joining fee.

And now for something completely different!!!!

On the transfer front!!!

CAN BRUNO BASH 'EM LIKE BUNGLE? Bruno has re-signed for the Watt as an outfield player, thus donating his hockeying brain and fantastic strike to the two's. The two's could find his goal scoring prowess invaluable.

WILL IT BE BUS PASS OR WALL PASS? The new Grandfather of the squad Cameron Ewer has agreed to donate his pace, skill and experience to the Watt for another season. Last season he played an important role in the resurgence of the Watt 1st XI after Christmas. Can his donation help push the Watt to promotion this year?

PRELUDE TO PATTER WITH PREVIOUSLY PRESUMED PENSIONED PAIR! There is word upon the grapevine that old boys Spoon and Hami who were thought to have played their last for the Watt may be prepared to make a comeback. However negotiations are still in the very early stages. Heads as experienced as these would surely be of great benefit to the Watt.

(All transfer saga's gratefully received on the back of a postcard, or through the medium of text message for all you technophiles out there!)

Lots of Love Nick x

Here we go again!!!!

I'd like to start by welcoming you all back to the hockey club and the blog after what seems like an eternity away. It's time to prepare for a new season, and here's the news hot, off the press and straight to your door. As per usual this post is here not just to inform you of developments but also to gauge opinion, so please post with opinions on what I've said.

The hockey club will re-commence activities on Wednesday 28th September (Freshers week) with a session at Peffermill. This will be used to take a look at the Freshers but also to select the teams for Saturday 1st October which is the first game of the season. After the training session we then have to conduct an EGM at which I hope to achieve two things. Firstly, the election of a new President. Secondly, over the next few weeks I plan to write and circulate a constitution, hopefully we can the ratify this at the meeting. Then ss is customary on any match day, Wednesday evening or EGM night we shall then hit the town with the Freshers and quite possibly the Ladies team too for a 'team bonding' session.

There are also going to be some changes for this year. We now have a new traing session on a Thursday night from 8.30-10pm at Saughton in addition to our Monday night slot at Peffermill.
The system for collecting subs abd fees is also going to change. Members will now pay a single contribution at the start of the year (Somewhere in the region of £80 but that's only a guesstimate [our crack accountant Matt Remes is on the job]). This contribution will pay for everything. You will no longer need to pay for anything e.g. buses, matches, training. It will all be covered by your subs. We are also getting 2 sets of shirts paid for by the sports union and kept by them. Players will provide their own shorts and socks.

Now a little dilemna, as our fixtures stand we can only play some our our home fixtures at Royal High due to them clashing with something ( This information is 2nd hand so don't shoot me I'm just the messenger.) Therefore we have 2 options. i) I can try and fit all our fixtures onto the weekends that Royal High have available by contacting the other clubs and see if they'll re-arrange. Or ii) The games we can't play at Royal High we play at Saughton. I need feedback on this within the next couple of days as if I go for the former it could take quite a lot of organising.

We're going to have a Rules night at some point, late October to early November. There will then be some friendlies to try and get some players badged. If you would like to be badged or have any ideas then contact Krebs as he's in charge of this one. The more people we get badged the less often people will get asked to umpire so please help your team matesand try and get badged.

Any technical questions about the website should be angled at Sean. Anything hockey related and I'll do my best to help. I hope you're all having a happy summer and that it continues.

Lots of Love Nick x

So...... This is how it goes then!

Having finished the season it's now time for the social and administrative sides of the squad to start. I shall begin by giving a brief explanation of the up and coming social events. We are going to have the end of season club games and dinner (most likely on the same day). This involves the Weds 1st XI playing an old boys team, this is a high quality and competitive game. This is then followed by the mens 2nd XI against the ladies' 1st XI. This is a slightly more relaxed encounter and very good fun is had by all! The mens team usually take the opportunity on the friday nite before the match to have a good piss-up with the old boys. This will prob take place at the end of week 5 or 6. This is followed by the club dinner where all members attend and get lashed whilst all of the seasons prizes are awarded. It's all good fun and a welcome break from exams.

Then we have the slightly more serious matter of the AGM. As the men's and ladies clubs are separate we have separate AGM's. Here's roughly what's going to happen at the mens: Firstly we shall have an intro by the president (Alan) Who runs the AGM. Then we have the captains reports. This is followed by deciding whether or not we want to enter any new leagues or cups (Possible discussion! Whether you reckon we should have a 2's indoor team or not?) This goes to a vote of the whole club, if you're a paid up member and present you get a vote on all issues, you also have the power to nominate or second people for positions. After this the fun starts! The nomination and election of positions. It starts with the President and works through to the Saturday 2's captain. The current President will open nominations for the new President ( at this point if you would like to nominate someone for President you do! Then when someone is nominated someone has to second the nomination, if this happens then the person is asked if they are willing to stand. Then everybody who has been nominated and agreed to stand is asked to leave the room and the people who nominated them make a speech on their behalf. A vote is then held and the candidates are invited back into the room for the result to be announced. Thne once all the positions have been elected, we rejoice! Then head out and get wankered as is traditional on a wednesday night!!!! So start havin a wee think about who you think would be good at what. Any q's you've got about what each committee member does, feel free to ask! The AGM is next Wednesday in the Sports fayre at 7pm!

See you all there kids!

Love Nick x